For the streamer who’s worried the one they want will not accept them
Note: This is a very specific reading, but you are more than welcome to take insights and learn from this, Reader.
Your life is about to take an interesting turn, Seeker. Something you’ve longed for is about to come true… but there are obstacles in the way.
Mainly, obstacles of your own making.
There is someone you hope to bring into your life. Someone you’ve been in contact with, someone you admire, someone you want to help in their own life and career.
But you’re terrified of how you’ll come across when you meet in person. You’ve been looking for flaws in yourself, dealbreakers, unattractive qualities that you’re sure will destroy whatever chance you have with this person.
I’m here to reassure you. Since this feels like a deeply emotional and spiritual connection, I’m using the Influence of the Angels deck.
Your current feelings
Obviously, this is causing you a lot of distress to the point where your thinking is clouded. But despite any overwhelming feelings, you may be looking for help or advice on how to get a handle on this—especially since this is a potentially life-changing encounter. In fact, the information you seek may very well tear down any doubts, tired patterns, or self-sabotaging beliefs you’ve been carrying.
The reality of your feelings
Digging deeper, we’ll find the core of what’s driving these feelings. The Lovers here not only point to an important relationship but a choice. This partnership you hope to cement with this person is one you’ve wanted for a long time. You may even see yourself in this person; your other half. You understand that if you want to pursue a relationship with this person, you’ll have to make a choice—what exactly that choice is, only you know.
The Queen of Pentacles here highlights your desire to nurture this connection. You may wish to be a provider or generously support this person. By nature, you are a giving person, but you’re practical and also discerning about where you spend your energy and affection. You may already be imagining living a simple but fulfilling life with this person where you provide for the other—whether it’s material comforts or emotional support.
However, with the Ace of Pentacles reversed, there’s something weighing on your mind. You might be worried that you won’t act soon enough, that you’ll misspeak, or somehow this opportunity will slip out of your hands. There might even be a concern about physical or health issues and how this person might be affected.
How this person already views you
With the Chariot, this person seems to view you as someone who’s very much in control of any situation you find yourself in; things seem to fall effortlessly in place for you, or you can make things happen the way you want them. They may also see you as someone who’s highly disciplined and determined; someone who’s successful no matter what they do.
The Seven of Pentacles seems to reveal two different observations. This person may believe that you’re carefully planning something; you have the future on your mind. But the second meaning of this card could suggest that this person is patient and understanding. They know you’re probably nervous or worried, but they’re willing to walk with you through any doubts or concerns you have. The illustration in this card shows a garden—they want to grow something with you. Gardens take time. This person is aware of this and wants to share the journey with you.
Lastly, the Ten of Pentacles shows legacy, material success, a solid foundation. This person feels that you would make a good provider, and they wouldn’t have to worry about comforts or basic needs. It could also mean that they want to build something lasting with you—a family, a big project, or something valuable to pass along to the next generation.
What you can keep in mind when you meet this person
Traditionally, the Hermit reversed suggests coming out of isolation and seeking help or advice from others. In this deck, the Hermit reversed means loneliness, being self-absorbed, and “neurotic introspection”. There’s a real chance that you’re overthinking and allowing your imagination to pile up disasters and tragedies that may not even have a chance of happening.
In fact, the Knight of Swords reversed further suggests that the unkind, disastrous thoughts about yourself or your situation aren’t budging. You may even try to hide them. But in doing that, you may risk hurting this person by trying to hide your true emotions. By trying to come off as cool and unbothered, your mood or actions may be misinterpreted, resulting in unintentionally jeopardizing the connection before it has a chance to flourish.
The Seven of Swords points to self-deception in this context. Clarifying with Three of Swords, Two of Wands, and Empress reversed, we see a lot of emotional anguish and heartbreak… but we also see a chance to change that way of thinking. A part of you is ready to move on from the life you already have, but another part is looking to destroy it as well. As seen with the Empress reversed, giving in to this mindset that you don’t deserve this connection, or that you’re not good enough for this person, will definitely ruin the happiness that you’ve wanted for so long.
This feels like self-sabotage at work. You’re probably used to heartbreak and disappointment, feeling unsupported and unloved, especially in matters of love and personal relationships. But here, you do have a choice: allow these negative feelings to stay on the surface and poison your actions, ruining the opportunity you’ve spent a lifetime seeking… or push them aside, be open and honest with this person, and see what grows between you two.
What this person wants you to know
This person does have a message for you. They seem to be aware of the turmoil you’re going through, but they feel helpless about how to help you.
With the Wheel of Fortune reversed, this person has felt trapped and stuck as well; they haven’t had the best of luck in relationships, platonic or romantic. But where you’re concerned, they feel like they’ve found someone special. With the Hierophant, they feel guided in meeting you and making something with you, whether it’s a collaboration or even a life. The Eight of Swords reversed shows that they’ve done work on themselves and have let go of doubts, strict expectations; they’re ready to allow whatever is guiding them to nudge them into what fate has in store. And they’re ready to help you let go of the feelings and thoughts holding you back.
They’re excited for this. The only way they’ll be disappointed is if you push them away or don’t show up.
You both know how you feel about each other. The only thing you both need to do is show up and allow events to progress as they may.